Rainy Day at the Bach

From the transcript of Rainy Day at the Bach – broadcast on National Radio New Zealand in January 2007

I was always a maverick at school. I felt there was something more for me, and my grandmother used to say: “There’s a better life, and you can do it.” I had no idea what it was, but I knew that I would be going to America as soon as possible, to live there, to explore and experiment.

As soon as I left school, that is where I went. It was during a very interesting time - the early days of the Age of Aquarius, with the faith-and-flowers scene. I saw it disintegrate with the escalation of the Vietnam War. I lived in Washington DC at the height of the marches and protests, and leading into Watergate. It was a very exciting time to be living there at such a young age.

During this time I began to think about taking up causes and how to express that it my life. I arrived in Washington as the product of a very staid, strict environment after growing up in Christchurch, New Zealand. I think we all have talents, beliefs and strengths that are not always brought out because we are not allowed to express them. In Christchurch it was considered very demeaning and adverse to break the mould. But in Washington I found myself in an atmosphere where you could express who you were in what you did. So I went on the marches, boycotted and protested. It was fantastic. It gave me a sense of fighting against injustice.

Law was in my heart through all these years. When I was 12 or13 years old, I had seen the movie Twelve Angry Men, and I never forgot it. I thought the man played by Henry Fonda was fantastic; he persevered and saved the boy. At high school, I always dreamed of being somebody in a courtroom, and coming from the back foot. It was always defence, never prosecution. I always dreamed of trying to protect those who weren’t as eloquent as I was – or as bolshy – and I had that role at school. If I saw bullying or injustice, I was always there protesting.

I returned to New Zealand and took up law. When I completed my studies, I found myself taking on some really difficult criminal cases. I think this was because I had moved in some interesting places in my life. I had been amongst a lot of tough mavericks, people who wouldn’t just bow down. I think that gave me an understanding of people, an ability to read body language and beyond, to really see the person underneath. I saw the human side of everybody.

Because I had always wanted to get into that side of law, I went as soon as I possibly could to the areas of Auckland where all the major crime was happening. I defended people who really needed help. I had very high energy and I’ve always been very driven, and I thrived on the challenging life I led.

All my working life, I have been asked how I can defend clients who have been charged with murders and rapes – quite high profile cases. My answer will always be that I find it quite easy to defend anybody. And in particular, the more a client is targeted and despised by society, the more I want them to have the best I can offer, in terms of representation.

That is what the law allows. Until the law changes, I will fight desperately for human rights. That is one of them - you are presumed innocent. You must have somebody who does not judge you, does not say you are guilty or innocent, and will do the best for you. Sometimes pleading guilty is the best thing for a client to do, and then I fight for the best outcome and the best sentence for them.

At times, in the faces of tough gang people, I see that they are right back in the playground. I see in their eyes that they are right back where they were isolated and ostracised. For some, the defence has been to just lash out. A lot of the time they don’t know why they do what they do. They don’t want to do what they do. Somehow you have to step in and try and break that cycle for them. I get to see the very human side of people charged with horrendous crimes, and I get to understand how they ended up in the court: things just got out of control.

I see good people in there. I see intelligence and caring; and I see the terrible abuse they have been put through – abuse that most of us would not survive. We cannot conceive of the terrible lives some people have had. They have been brutalised, beaten and beaten down. I think it’s a terrible thing to feel the isolation of not feeling a part of your own community. But it is not used as an excuse.

I think society sets the stage for crime and then the criminal commits it. This happens because too often society leaves a lot of people uneducated, living in dreadful situations. It’s easy to close our eyes and ignore some of what’s happening. It is easy to judge people and say: “It’s all your fault. If you really wanted to be a good person, you could be.”

But for them this is not easy. There are so many situations that could be fixed if the community reaches out and decides to provide good quality schooling for every child. We need to take kids out of abusive homes – without cutting them off from their families.

We also need to provide really intensive alcohol treatment, because I think the major problem in New Zealand is not drugs, or promiscuousness. It’s alcohol. Alcohol destroys so much, but we don’t have the programmes to fight it where it destroys most.

Sometimes clients come back to see me after they have managed to get themselves out of the life they were in. Some call me and tell me about their children’s progress and education. They put everything into their kids. And I get a real buzz out of it every time.

I will always be involved in law. But I am also exploring the wider international picture, dealing with human rights issues, and war crimes tribunals. I am interested in going on fact-finding missions; going to places where people are setting up systems of democracy, and justice systems with no access to libraries, or case law

I think we should all hold on to hope. Terrible things happen among people, but everywhere I see that human beings are very strong. People are connected to each other, and what matters is that we help each other. I believe that we must each share the load of others, and do whatever it takes to help strangers or other citizens.

Many wonderful people make it their life work to go into very dangerous, stressful situations, domestic or global, and see huge tragedy. They take on the task and in they go, rescuing and taking the load. I see this as a sign of hope for our future.